TRAVEL STORY 1: Smashed

I am one of the clumsiest people I know, so it should not have come as any surprise when I smashed a glass in a hotel room. I wish it could have been a rockstar moment at 4am where I was insisting that the bellboy bring me ketchup in a miniature bottle instead of in a small cup. I love those mini bottles! Alas, I just drank too much. 

Photo by davetoaster on Flickr

For my corporate job (in Publishing, which is what everyone thinks of when they hear “corporate,” for sure), we were on a retreat on the west coast of the U.S. And by “retreat,” I mean we sat in a conference room with no windows for three days. Because there had been issues with people spending too much at the bar on their corporate cards the previous year, the organizers rented a bungalow on the property and filled it with free booze and snacks. Unsurprisingly, this is where everyone ended up at the end of the night. On the third night there, I left the boozy bungalow shortly after my manager’s manager whispered to another male coworker to “be gentle” with me. Ohhh dear.

Back in my room (alone, might I add), I knew I had to hydrate. We had these amazing, large bath tubs separate from the showers in our rooms. I couldn’t wait to use it. But it was not to be. Somehow, and I really cannot determine how it happened, the water in the glass ended up in the tub (okay), along with a thousand shards of broken hotel glass (not okay). Here is professional (I just made it in MS Paint, right this second…despite working for a Publishing company, I don’t have any better design software! WoO!) a sketch of the bathroom to show you just how improbable this is. 

Lesson: Alcohol is bad for you and your tub of dreams.